When I started this journey I did not imagined myself following rules, one of the things that attracted me the most about reform Judaism is the fact that we do not follow the 613 Mitzvot just because G-d told us to or because is written here and there but because we feel a connection with the ones that we practice/follow.
That being said, I knew circumcision was on the top of my list, I knew I didn’t wanna be part of the biker gang and not having the tattoo everyone else has :)
I also love (as many converts from what I can perceive) wearing a kippah, wearing one feels like a massage under the sun, drinking pina colada in a south pacific beach but still I decided to use it during services at the shul but I might extend that for when I pray at home.
When I first told my boyfriend I was converting some of his first questions were, are you gonna be wearing a kippah all the time and are you gonna stop eating pork? My answer was a firm NO to both, but oh boy, who would have thought, I did not have the intention to stop eating pork but as weeks passed by it starting tasting weird up until the point that I couldn’t bear to swallow it anymore, I do however still eat hot dogs, some other sausages, and never really ate bacon other than in Cesar’s salad, I do not think these habits will change but who knows, maybe in a few weeks I will be a declared enemy of hot dogs.
I keep asking myself the reason why, why did I start feeling like this? Why I cant eat pork anymore when I did not have the intention, scientifically speaking I like to think is some kind of psychological effect, kind of like placebos work but in the opposite sense, but I also like to think that my inner Jew, the one I am discovering inside my soul is coming out of the closet….again.